Shower in the Dark, Make Love With The Lights On…….

For many of us the assault on our senses starts with the bleeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrr of the alarm clock that signals the start of another nine-to-five day.  Then there is breakfast TV or radio, family drama’s, demands from pets (yours or neighbours), mobile phone interruptions and the ever-present lure of social media (come on, I can’t be the only one who’s checking face book status updates while waiting for the kettle to boil……).  Next is the commute, the coffee shop queue, the quick errand run and then the workplace to navigate before we finally make it to our designated spot ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTED.

But it doesn’t stop there and by the time the 5 o-clock bell tolls we would probably give anything for just five minutes of nothingness. So, what can we do about it?

Have fun with your senses

Well,  today I got a rare chance to stop and have coffee with some of my girl friends while the mini people of our lives were participating in a school-holiday yoga session in the local library (we live in the mountains, what more can I say…). The first topic of conversation was meditation  and our lack of ability to slow the whirring mind even though we all feel that we should.  It’s not because we don’ try,  one of my friends is a regular yoga devotee while another is well known for her ability to make herself invisible enough to write (and publish) short stories but alas, we are somewhat crapola in the tumbleweed brain department.

It seems that for the modern woman (whatever that is) intentional tumble-weed brain moments are just not happening and that is why I think we should try the above.

Shower in the dark.

With electricity prices soaring I am sure that everyone is showering in the dark these days but I’ve found that there is showering and SHOWERING.  Turning off the lights, shutting the door and  bringing your attention to your body starts to feel like real meditation in action once the sense of sight has been quietened.  In the absence of any disractions it is easy to feel the water wash away the dramas of the day as it slowly cleanses and soaks your aching muscles.  Being dark makes it easy to avoid doing too much – no leg shaving, no shampoo/ conditioner/ treatment/ scrub/ mask and also makes your sense of touch and sound much stronger.  Just you and the water makes for the perfect baptism of relaxation. Oh, and if you are worried about wasting water (and who isn’t?)  showering out of a bowl works just as well – just mind your footing.

Make Love with the Lights On.

OK so not quite so carbon neutral but this is also worth a try for us strung out crazy women with over-stimulation issues.  Now this may seem counter-intuitive (especially when the shower in the dark feels so good) but there is a good reason for doing it.  Making love in the light puts a different spin on things, especially when you don’t usually do it!   The reason that I think it helps slow the whirring mind is that it actually makes you focus on someone other than yourself!   Not wanting to kiss and tell but how many of us have mid-happy moment remembered that we forgot to turn the iron off/ get washing powder from the store/ send that e-mail or return an important phone call mid-moment?   Throwing a little light on your subject and then looking it in the eye ensures that you stay in the moment – at least for a moment.  It can also help boost self-esteem for you to see your partners love and enjoyment of you during this most intimate of times.

I guess for me it is all about making a conscious choice of how to engage your senses and sometimes mixing it up a little just helps you to step yourself away from the crossfire of every-day living.   Both of these tricks work for me – well, for a few minutes or so anyway but sometimes that is all you need.  Let me know if you have any more easy tips to taming your life and boosting your sensual well-being as I’d be glad to hear them.

Have fun exploring.

 Amanda Foxon-Hill



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